Worth Dying For
by OnyxSamurai
Summary: A soldier's loyalty for his commander should be unwavering. slight AU


The first time I saw her was two years ago.

She saved my life.

She was amazing, fighting the first level boss with quick, lighting-fast strikes. Watching her was like watching a master artisan paint. Her rapier was like her paintbrush, striking the boss in different places with ease.

My entire party had been wiped out.

As I lay there, awaiting the blow that would kill me, she came.

She fought off the boss, saving my life.

From that moment in time, I could tell that she would be great.

That she was meant to lead us, that she was meant to lead me.

I silently pledged my blade to her that day, pledging my life, my sword and everything I am, to her and her safety.

I pledged that I would train harder, and be stronger. Strong enough to protect her as a her soldier.

….

I was right, eventually, she did lead.

She became vice-commander, but in my eyes, she was the only commander whose orders I would be willing to follow.

She led us into countless battles, and I've followed her through them.

I've fought and bled and struggled with her.

And I'll never regret doing so, even though she didn't know who I was.

She was my commander, and I'll never hesitate to follow her into battle.

I'd be lost without her.

…

I look back and wonder how I've made it this far.

I look at everyone fighting on the front lines and see only a portion of the once great force that was willing to fight for a way out of this world.

More and more of us were dying.

But that could never deter me. Fighting beside my commander was more than enough to tell me that everything was going to be alright.

She was what kept me going.

She was the reason why I picked up my sword and fought every day.

The reason why I never gave up.

...

I wasn't surprised when I began to long for her.

She was beautiful, smart and skilled. Destined to succeed in whatever she decides to do.

I would frown and defend her honor when the men talked ill and lusted for her.

But secretly, I wanted nothing more than her to be in my arms.

I wanted nothing more than to hug her, and tell her that everything would be alright.

….

I thought of confessing numerous times, but I've always stopped myself.

She was my commander, and I, her soldier.

Who was I to break that chain of command?

I was a soldier, she was a commander.

How can two people, so different, become one?

….

She never noticed me.

I've fought with her, suffered with her, struggled with her.

I smashed her foes, destroyed them.

But that won't ever be enough to make her notice.

My shield blocked blows and strikes that would've killed her.

But she never noticed.

I've become a man hardened by war. Striking down foes that I never dreamed of fighting.

But she never noticed.

….

I've fallen in love with her.

Therefore, I've failed as her soldier.

How could I not have fallen in love with her?

Her beautiful orange hair swayed, every time she swung her rapier. Her face, though engaged in a fight with her enemy, would be focused, but still beautiful in every aspect. Her movements were graceful, striking down foes with an unearthly serenity.

Her smile, though small and reserved, would light up my world, and tell me that everything would be alright.

….

The more I think about her perfection, would make me think about my imperfection.

I was a normal guy, nothing special about me.

It was impossible that someone like her would ever fall for someone like me.

People like her wouldn't give people like me the time of day.

So I've made myself content with watching her from the shadows, ready to emerge and fight off the darkness that threatened to submerge her.

Because I love her.

And sometimes, love means loving someone, without them ever loving you back.

….

I loved her so much that I've written songs about her.

I've lost count in terms of quantity.

I sing to myself, hoping that she'd be able to hear me.

And chiding myself, for hoping so foolishly.

….

She got married.

To someone famed to be so powerful nonetheless.

A part of me is happy.

Happy that someone swept her off her feet and made her happy.

Happy that the person who married her is a hero.

Happy that the person who married her is renowned as a good man.

Happy that the person who married her is worthy,

unlike me.

….

A part of me hurts.

Hurt is an understatement.

I should be happy, seeing them both together, seeing her smile more.

I should smile too.

But all I can manage is a half-hearted smile.

My chest hurts, it feels like my heart was ripped out and cut to millions of pieces.

Still, she was better off with him than with me.

For I, could never have made her as happy as he has.

Could never make her smile as bright as he does.

Could never love her like he can.

….

It's been two years now

It feels like such a long time.

Fought for the chance to go back to reality and begin again.

But… I… don't want to go back.

I didn't want to leave her.

My commander, the person I loved most in this world.

She has spread her wings and has flown away, with the one she loved.

And I would be forever grounded, unable to do anything.

….

She isstill everything to me.

She was my sun.

My moon.

My stars.

The reason why I fought so hard.

The reason why I survived as long as I have.

The reason why I sing the songs that I do.

My everything.

….

We were approaching the final levels.

Only a handful of us remaining.

But that doesn't deter me, As long as I have my commander to lead me, I'd be fine.

I was prepared to fight and defend her with my life, if need be.

Because I love her.

And that's all that matters.

….

I choked on the pain that came from my chest.

The 'creator's' sword penetrated my chest.

I jumped in front of her

Because she jumped in front of the one she loved, so did I.

She looked at me, a mixture of shock and terror graced her beautiful features.

The 'creator' ripped out his sword as his battle with the great 'hero' raged on.

I collapsed to the ground, tired.

Tired of the battle, tired of this life.

She propped me up to her lap, looking up at her, the light starting to claim me.

"Why?" she asked, the tears now streaming down her cheeks.

"Because you're worth dying for."

The shock on her face deepens, tears forming at the edges of her eyes.

With the last of my strength, I reached up to wipe the tears off her beautiful face.

I smiled.

It was a pained, sad smile. The first and last smile I'll ever give her personally. A smile that could never repay the countless amount of smiles she has unknowingly given me.

Now, as I close my eyes, the light claiming my existence in this world,

I am happy.

Happy that I've fulfilled my purpose.

Happy that I got to know this world and everything beautiful in it.

Happy that I've gotten a chance to love her.

….

She will always be everything to me.

She was my sun.

My moon.

My stars.

The light in the darkness.

The serenity in the silence.

The reason why I fought so hard.

The reason why I survived as long as I have.

The reason why I sing the songs that I do.

My world.

My everything.

The only thing worth dying for.


End file.
